Who's fault is it when no one is there to help you?
Who's fault is it when u fall sick?
I don't hear voices that comes from the space of gratitude.
I don't feel the vibe of appreciation.
I don't see a sense of independence.
All you know is to make people feel guilty for not helping you.
All you know is to start the blame game when you fall.
All you know is shouts at people's face after being helped or done you a favor.
All you know is making people feel like shit!
You don't treat your own family members who loves you dearly like human. You treat them like slaves.
WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT????
Treating others like royals.
Treating others so nice with a big fat smile on your face as if they will be the one who will be sending you to hospital when you r sick in the middle of the night or in the start of the morning even before the sun is out.
WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT????
No one in this world will truly love you or help you to the core of your misery other than your own family.
When I mentioned family here is NOT relatives.
They probably hold these titles in the hierarchy in your life:
1. Husband/Wife
2. Son/Daughter
3. Grandchildren
The list stops until just right there.
It will literally cost you chest pain or even death to know there no one will ever be there for you because you are a prick and ungrateful human being even after being helped.
Well, I'm not Lela.....
I'm freaking Me!
Thank you for raising me to be a heartless human being just like you. I have to find humanity in my own way.
A path without you in it!
I feel sorry for me for still begging for your love when I was being abused.
I feel sorry for me for being so nice to my sister when I was being betrayed.
I just have no choice.
All I know is I never asked to be born to this earth.
Few days ago when we were out at the mall, you feel like going to the toilet. So being you needing an assistant all the time when you are in the toilet, I followed. But you said to your husband that you want him in with you.
Why don't I see that happening when Lela is around?
Am I hopeless?
Am I not having the same title as Lela?
Am I anak haram (illegitimate child)?
Will it cause you discomfort having me around?
I will not help you ever again if it's not a life threatening situation.
Looks like all the illness complication that is 'gifted' to you don't make you a better human but just a heartless and no gratitude soul.
You never regard me the same status as Lela is.
Lela is always better than me.
She's always the best in your eyes.
She is everything.
Because she's your daughter and I'm not!
I'm just an illegitimate child that probably didn't come from your womb.
Even if I'm born out of wedlock, it's not me to be blame. I didn't asked to be born that way to this earth.
My 'parents' (whoever they are) should be ashamed to even say that to me. They have sex before marriage and conceive.
Someone along the line is making a bloody big mistake.
But I'm not less then human for being born that way.
You don't love me?
I LOVE ME!